Her

By Reeni Merlin Roy

I played the song that I thought she would like. The song she would want to hear. But then I heard her shutting off the shower and coming close to me. Her hands were dripping wet, but she was careful. She wiped her fingers and came to a stop next to me. I couldn’t understand what mood she was in but hopefully, the next song will give me a clue. A faster beat starts playing and she gets all hyped up, dabbing furiously to the music. 

‘See, this is what I want to hear while I shower. Bathroom is the one place I can bring out all my crazy-ninja-attempt-dance-steps without getting caught.’ She says this, smiling to herself and keeps me back from where she took me. I like her putting me on shuffle, so that I can chose the music which she might want to listen. And when I make her smile with the songs I play, it makes me feel that we are closer, that we connect more on another level. As I hear her rapping in the shower, I feel myself slip into memory lane. The beginning of everything.

It all began on a normal night. I was tired of being shelved all the time and although it was the season of sales, no one seemed to notice me amongst the plentiful. I felt myself being unboxed once again and laid down with others of my same kind. And that’s when we met. 

I was a present to her from her parents. They had come to the shop to buy something that is considered essential in today’s world. A mobile phone.  She was going away from home, so, it was just perfect that a telecommunication device be a present. And let me tell you, I wasn’t the best one in the lot. But she chose me. I don’t know why, but, she did. And I am forever grateful to her for that. She was very excited in getting to know me just as I was with her. As soon as she got home, she started exploring me, bit by bit. I am very much happy to say she was really good at it. She grasped very easily all my functions and mechanisms. And I was able to satisfy her likes, as the time passed.

‘Ooh, showers are so damn refreshing.’ She said while toweling her hair. ‘I am sure anyone hearing me talking to myself would think I’m crazy, but, in all honesty I’m not.’ She murmured, ‘Oh God, did I just justify to myself. I am going crazy. Period.’ She told to herself looking at the mirror. Now you get why it’s fun with her.

She strolls out of the bathroom, freshly dressed, with me in hand. I show her all that she missed and she ends up sitting on the bed clicking on all that I had saved for her. Slowly the time drawls and I bask in the warmth of her fingers. Suddenly she drops me.

‘Wait a minute.’ She says. I realize she has just read some text messages which I had notified her of. It’s from a guy she likes. She can’t hide anything from me. Because its me. I know everything of hers. Its not like I have a choice. I am her constant companion and her best friend, in the truest form. I can’t hide anything of mine either. That’s why, I said we are close, in the utmost perfectly way that you can find.

She goes to her computer and from where I am, I can see her logging into her mail. There are many unread messages and I see her clicking on the latest one. I couldn’t see what’s written on the screen, just three line written in the mail. She didn’t move, just sat there, staring at the screen. I didn’t understand what had happened, but I kept watching her. Not understanding. Not realizing. 

After a while she got up from her seat. She faced the bed and that’s when I saw her. She was shivering and there were tears streaming down her face. Her fingers were shaking, making it seem as if they were in an extremely harsh climate. But what shook me was the fact that she didn’t realize all this happening to her. It was as if she was lost inside her head. As if she was drowning deep in something. As if the entire world- all that she had sacrificed, all that she had worked hard to build, crumbled around her.

She dropped down on the bed, right next to me, and she looked at me. I saw her eyes and that’s when I realized. The silence was just momentary. It was the silence before a storm. And that storm was brewing inside her. She looked at me. I knew she was contemplating something. I was dying of curiosity. Of what might happen. I have no other choice though, except to wait. I didn’t have to wait long because at the next moment, she turned to the lamp stand and pushes it bringing down everything on the table with it. Her scream is not as big as the sound of the lamp breaking, but I could feel the disposition in her. The fear in her mind echoing through the tremors of her voice. And it did not escape my notice that she might have been contemplating whether or not to smash me. I could hear her breaking more things, turning the room into a hazard zone. It stopped as spontaneously as it had started though. I could hear her breaking down, shattering as the glass pieces around her. She climbed into the bed and crouched, hugging herself. Not a tear dropped down her face, but, something told me, it was not as simple as that. She kept on murmuring next to me. Nothing she said was legible for me and the more the time passed, the more silent she became. She didn’t fall asleep. I knew she wouldn’t.

As the heat of the day died down, she got up, her eyes firm as steel, reflecting a resolve in them. She began picking up all the remnants of her destruction. She moved about, her body language screaming purpose and…  in a way…. Revenge. I don’t know from where that word came to me, but that’s what she reminded me of. It’s the first time she’s been this distant from me. She would at least use me, to talk to someone; at the very least, distract herself by watching something or texting someone. This reaction is entirely new from her for me. And it scares me. More than I can comprehend.

‘You thought you could destroy me didn’t you. With just some stupid words, you thought I would fall, didn’t you? ‘she began talking to herself and I realized it’s my cue to tune in and understand what exactly had happened. I have never been more grateful for her thinking out loud than I am now.  ‘You are right. You used me. You broke me. You destroyed me. Utterly. But, you thought you could get away with it didn’t you.’ She began pacing around. Looking out the window, she then said ‘If I’m going down, I sure as hell will bring you down with me. Down to the darkest pits of hell.’ She vowed.

 She then went back to her computer and typed something. I assume it has to be to the sender of her previous mail. She waited. Soon, the person replied. After a couple of messages, she signed out, turned off her computer and came back to me. She looked through me, all that I had notified her of. She then sent messages to her parents. And then to her friends. To all of them. It seemed strange, but then, she is unpredictable. She put me to charge and then began tidying up her room. As she was about to get done, her mother called her. She replied back, cheerful than ever. It is true when they say; faking happiness is easier than being happy. I heard her mother asking about her and all her replies made her mom laugh. It is a wonder what all a person can do to make another happy. She hung up soon and continued tiding up. After making the room spotless, she began to clear her wardrobe. Making sure everything is where they’re supposed to be. And perfect. As if there’s a showdown waiting to happen, and she was preparing for war. I never thought that I would have to bite my words any sooner.

She sat down next to me. I was still charging and she looked at me every minute or so. She then began changing the settings in me. Deleted all the photo, video and music files. Uninstalled all the apps in her phone. Shifted all the settings to automatic save to SD card. What I thought was true. She was going to war. 

She then began walking around. Since it was a PG residence, she did not have much friends who were free or close enough. At the rate she was moving and with all the unpredictable things she was doing, I wished someone was there who was free enough to come and help her out. 

Time flew by.

The sun had set and the night sky made its presence known by being darker than ever. I started to feel more relaxed as she had appeared to have become calmer than before. Much more relaxed. I felt full and soon she came hoping onto my side. She then called the guy whom she liked. Their conversation was monosyllabic, and me being me, I couldn’t understand the context. But then, what she did next was scarier for me. I am someone who is afraid of heights and as soon as she cut the call, she took me and placed me. On top of the cupboard. She placed me inside a pocket of some luggage, I guess. And just before going down, I heard her whisper, ‘Please let it work.’

I couldn’t understand anything that was going on but now I knew I didn’t have to wait long. She went out and soon enough came back with the guy she liked. I think I should start calling him something other than a description. Let’s go for the ‘guy’, shall we? The moment he walked in; I knew he wasn’t supposed to be here.  And as soon as she shut the door, she faced him.

‘What was that mail you sent me?’ she asked. ‘Are you serious? Would you really do this to me?’

The ‘guy’, had walked in, looking at her room, exploring them inch by inch with his eyes. As soon as she asked the question, he looked back and smirked at her.

‘What did you think? You were the only girl I had “loved”’, he said, quoting loved with his fingers. ’I have done this to many more and you can’t blame me for you being too naïve. I just saw an opportunity and I never thought of letting it go. I like opportunities like you. I can’t let them slip away without having at least a bit of fun.’ 

By the time he said this, she had tears streaming down her face. ‘So… All this time, I was just a game. I was just another opportunity. I was just another someone for you.’

He looked at her. And smiled.

This angered her. I knew that she would not let him off now. She had given him a chance, and he tossed it out the window. I still couldn’t understand though, what happened. What triggered her? What was the beginning of it all?

‘So, the video. I need it back.’ She said after clearing her voice and wiping her eyes. She is strong and I couldn’t be more proud of her.

‘Oh… Finally, we step into the right matter of discussion. I came here for that baby.’ He said moving closer to her, flirting with her hair.

And her, she didn’t move an inch. She stood there, looking into his eyes.’ What do you want from me?’ 

‘You know exactly what I want.’ He whispers into her ear.

‘Don’t you dare think you will get away, playing with me. I am not just another someone. I am more than that. Much more.’ She replies. ‘Everything I have built is at risk, because of me, being careless with you. You are right I am too naïve. But you made a mistake. You underestimated me. ‘And then she looks at me. 

She knee-balls him to his crotch and steps back, swishing her arm. He crouches down in pain and cusses out loud. And that’s when I saw, in her hand, the broken lamp’s glass shard dripping with blood. She looks at him with contempt and moves backward in the direction of her door. Just as she turns to open the door, he comes running slamming into her and shutting the door, at the same time. It is a battle of strength, and soon he pushes her onto the floor. When she looks up I notice her head bleeding. She has hit her head somewhere. I am in complete panic mode and I just don’t know what is happening. It is going faster than I can grasp and I feel like hyperventilating is a small word to describe my feeling. 

She gets up. Or at least tries to. ‘You tried to play with me, didn’t you?’ He says, walking around her. ‘This is for hitting me.’ He says, kicking her. She crouches down gasping for breath. ‘And this,’ he says, kicking her once more, ’is for trying to act smart.’ He pulls her up by her hair and says, ‘This is for even thinking that you can hurt me, in any way possible.’ and then slaps her right on.

She falls, face flat onto the ground. I thought by now she would have lost consciousness. I couldn’t understand how things had ended up like this. She crouches once more and tries to get up. He stamps her on the back, pushing her down. 

‘I don’t want you up. Stay down. You are meant to be down. Don’t you dare think of making another move. Be grateful that I didn’t kill you.’ He says, walking around her. 

And so she doesn’t move. Not even an inch. She lies there. For long than I think she should. She doesn’t move, setting off alarm bells. He too can feel it. The fear. Whether everything has gone too far. Whether this time would be his last time. I could see it in him. His fears.

He touches her and flips her over. She is bleeding in her stomach, where the glass shard has gone into. He did indeed cross the line. And this time there is no turning back. I could hear him tensing up. He was freaking out. After a moment’s thought, the only thing he did was, he ran. He ran away from her and out of the room. He never even looked back. Nor, did he think of doing something to help her. He just ran. Afterall, that’s what is expected from him. Bullies are cowards. Period.

Although I knew all this was happening, I couldn’t focus on it completely. I was looking at her. Her eyes. They were looking at me. She hadn’t lost consciousness as I expected her to. She is a fighter. To her last breath.  And her face, it had a sinister smile. The coldest of them all, which had me trembling in my wits. I couldn’t take it anymore. I was feeling weaker. Weaker than ever. Almost as if I was losing myself. 

I was too focused on her that I didn’t realize it. And now, as I felt myself losing consciousness, I realized something. The meaning behind her smile. The meaning behind her actions. The meaning behind everything.

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EPILOGUE

The police inspector looked ahead, watching his assistant coming up to him in haste. He closed the case file that he was looking at and waited for the constable to come to a standstill and catch his breath. 

‘Sir, the girl has regained consciousness.  Doctors have said that she needs to be kept under observation, but her vitals are looking good.’ 

‘What about the parents? Do they know?’

‘They were there sir, when she woke up. As soon as the doctors gave the go sign, her parents rushed in. ‘said the constable.

Starting to move towards the lift, the inspector replied, ‘Then come on, we have to take her statement.  What she says can determine the fate of not just one life, but a lot other more.’

‘Yes sir. I was honestly shocked at the number of girls he had ruined before her. And the fact that they were silent is the one that is more horrifying. He broke them to that stage.’ The last sentence just a whisper. The inspector glimpsed at him, while stepping into the lift.  

As the lift started moving up, the inspector analyzed all the evidences that were found in the scene of crime. The phone being the prime one. There was just a video in it, and that video being the most crucial evidence as well as the development of the case. But then questions began popping into his head, why would she need to delete every single data on her phone. It seemed as if she planned to erase herself. And also all the messages she had send last seemed like a goodbye note, instead of something more casual. Another striking point is her room. Everything in it was tidied up, into perfection, which makes it seem more to a person preparing for his last breath, rather than anything else. 

As they stepped outside of the lift, the inspector moved on forward still lost in his thoughts.

‘Sir.’

‘Yes.’

‘It’s this way.’ Said the constable, pointing to the left.

‘Yes, yes. I was just lost in my thoughts, that’s why I didn’t notice.’ Replied the inspector. ‘What did the convict say about stabbing her?’

‘Sir, he didn’t accept to that. He said that the glass shard dropped out of her hand when he pushed her and she stabbed herself on purpose. But sir, the glass shard dropping is not visible on the phone nor can we make sure whether it was underneath her. So we have no proof to that.’ 

Five doors later, they reached their destination. Sobs could be heard from inside and the two men looked between each other, buckling themselves up. As they prepared to go in, they knew they were thinking the same thing. Because of this girl, all the other victims were found and given the aid that they required. Because of her, a vile man was stopped. Respect is not demanded. It is earned. And in some level, they felt that respect for her.

Knocking on the door, they stepped in.

‘We are here to take the statement from your daughter, so please allow us to talk to her for a few moments.’

Her parents began protesting, demanding some patient leniency. But then she stopped them.

‘Don’t worry, it’s alright.’ Then she looked at the newcomers and smiled.

‘I have been waiting for you.’

By Reeni Merlin Roy