By Yashna Banga
Well, it's 2022, and we have officially entered another year of precariousness. It’s been quite a ride for most of us since COVID hit the world in 2020. Everyday is a new hustle and in that loop of being the best and doing all that it takes , to be out there, and succeed in everything that we put our foot in , is never out of sight. In this entire process, we as a generation gulp down so much of our feelings, failures, heartbreaks, emotions and dreams. Sometimes, it feels like walking on a trembling bridge where you realize that the world is falling apart and life is nothing but shattered pieces strung together. The minutes are changing into months and months are changing into hurricanes which are only getting stronger and we still don’t know what to do and what not to. Just the motivation to do things has been a constant struggle.
Our world has been limited to a room and a laptop screen and we, certainly, lead a life , brimmed with hopelessness and bizarreness. We are all finding it hard to adjust with the amalgamation of the fast pace of the world and hypochondriac episodes that have hit us in the last 2 years. We are devastated and struggling to live up with the changes.
People would laugh off if I say “let it be” and “look ahead “at this point of time. But, honestly, that’s the need of the hour. I am no philosopher, but , all I got to trust and believe is that ,”it’s okay”. It’s okay to have failed at marriage, relationship, career or friendship. We are so blinded by what we are trying to achieve that we have forgotten to acknowledge and appreciate all that we have left behind. Our quest of searching for something extraordinary has made us completely fall off track when it comes to ordinary love. We have almost given up on the comfort that comes after a long hug from a loved one or the smile that’s carved when we talk to an old friend. An unadulterated, unabridged happy time with our friends and family is not even a thought in our heads. We have all just become puppets in this wicked dynamic without realizing that we are all fighting different battles. Obviously, a precious hug or a delightful conversation with our favorite person won’t solve any of our issues. But isn’t that what life is all about? Wasn’t it always about learning, falling, growing and getting stronger than ever? Wasn’t it always about those little things?
Mate West once said “you only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” Yes, we are all trying to make a niche for ourselves and be ecstatic, successful and socially acceptable. But that’s not all what this journey is, was and will ever be. It’s much more than that. We are all trying to make peace with uncomfortable situations. But let’s just cut the crap, turn on the pause button, relax and reflect. We will soon realize that it’s alright for some things to just be. You don’t have to complete the entire book today. You don’t have to make Dalgona coffee and like it if that’s not your taste. You don’t have to watch that Netflix show that the world is writing about on twitter. You don’t have to visit that café everyone is binge eating at on Instagram. You don’t have to do an MBA after graduation just because that’s what everyone does. You don’t have to crack
IIT because your father wants you to be an engineer. You don’t have to hop on a tie-dye trend just because every Bollywood actress is calling it a style statement. You got to do what you want to. And the day, trust me, the day we get to know what we really want, half of it is done. Being on fast forward and ardently following terms and conditions stated by others is the worst we can do to ourselves. Let’s slow down a little and feel the raindrops, smell that rose in the backyard, dance like no one’s watching, put extra sugar syrup to our pancakes and blast through that summer air. Let’s do all that because that’s how we will be able to run faster.
We are easy to manipulate via social pressure and expectations. Most often, our ideas , ambitions and beliefs don’t resonate with someone else. What’s important is that we let those ideas breathe. It’s okay to have a different take on things. It’s okay for people to have a thought process unlike ours. None of us is ever right or wrong. It’s always okay until it makes sense to you and your heart says a “YES” to it. Making space for people and their opinions is important but it should never come at the cost of burning down your own interests.
Times are hard and all these things are easier said than done. But let’s just try and cling on to hope. A hope that “things will fall in place”. Believe in something. Choose a belief that doesn’t debilitate you today. There’s enough agony and pain in this world that literature can heal. But there’s also a new start each time something ends. All we need to do is, give a shout out to the
believer in us , who somewhere hopes that life will give us a happy moment only if we broaden our vision beyond the bleak and dark days. We have to keep looking ahead and we will finally see that good things are lurking in the corner and coming for us. We need to focus less on the setting sun and excitedly look forward to the rising moon. Let’s all look for days, opportunities and people who are capable of pulling us out of our slump in the most effortless way possible. Let’s not sink into sad days and wait for those little things that can save us. Let’s just get up after every fall. Let’s give ourselves that another chance. Let’s just ‘ look ahead’ one last time.
Sometimes we are so obsessed with taking control and we go against the grain on a lumber , with all our might, that we forget, it will only lead to splinters. Goals and achievements are important but let’s not climb the ladder to the rooftop by pushing someone down ruthlessly. Let’s not build a glasshouse for us at the expense of someone’s self worth. Humility never goes out of fashion no matter what. Be it the stranger who helped you at the metro station from tripping on the stairs. Be it the friend who had your back regardless of the obstacles . Be it the cousin who was by your side when someone joked about your body at an aunt’s engagement. You will always hold onto these people in your life as happy memories. Be that person to someone. It’s important to know that ripping someone to shreds isn’t casual. What will help us achieve our goals is being in alignment with ourselves, only then, this world will become a bliss for us. It's all going to be worth it like that. . The struggle, the hardships, the wounds and the labor. None of it would make sense if it comes after pelting stones at others. Look up at the stars and not your feet. Everything has a rhythm of its own . We just need to trust it because it almost always leads us home.
It might take a ridiculously long time for you to realize that it wasn’t okay at 12, it wasn’t okay at 18, it isn’t okay at 22 , to give up on yourself. You and only ‘you’ can help yourself create something with hunger in your bones. Let your heart do what it does the best : conquer, contuse ,collapse and cure. And if anyone tells you otherwise, the only thing that needs to change is the way they think .
By Yashna Banga
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