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One Gender Three Lives

Updated: Jun 6, 2023

By Kowsalya T



Accept it or not... There is always an unsaid inequality exists in the society, if spoken about it, it will be considered against the norm/taboo. Let’s see how the three lives of the same gender realise the inequality and react to that...

The very first life, Mrs.Yashodha, who was born on 1950. She is the last 5th girl child (no boy until that) to her parents, who got upset by this. Leaving the reason for her parents’upset, coming to Yashodha, she was quiet, obedient, orthodox girl. During her 8th STD, when her cloths got stained Red, the colour indicated a big full stop for her education and school life. A girl of that small age, in 1960s, I believe she was not aware of the fact that a woman should fight for her basic rights and education is the key to liberty. And by very soon, she got married to a groom of her parents’and family’s choice. The groom was as special as he was the 1st boy kid in his house, where he got all the servings in silver spoon. Without knowing what is foreplay, orgasm, climax, everything was over between the bride and groom in the first night. As years goes on, Yashodha given birth to 3 children one by one. All the household activities, farm activities, child caring would been done by her and her husband being a government servant eat, go to office, watch news, sleep and repeat it. Yashodha didn’t even know the salary of her husband as the finances were out of her control. As they lived in a joint family, the food prepared would not be sufficient for the last eater (unluckily its always Yashodha who eats last). This is the irony that a soul which prepared the food, is the soul that ends up hungry/ half stomach. One day, at the late 60s, Yashodha came to know that her husband cheated her and was maintaining another family with another woman. After all scoldings, screaming, sufferings, the days gone by and definitely not ended in divorce. With all hatred inside, she served her husband

every day. Her husband enjoyed his old age days with pension amount. Whatever, the prince and maid (you know who am telling) lived a decent life with a name of good family to the society’s eyes. Don’t know whether the Yashodha happily lived or not.

The second life, Mrs.Suganthi, who was born on 1975. She was a baby girl after 2 baby boys. She was also quiet, obedient, homely girl. She studied well unlike her brothers. Her father had been supportive to finish her higher secondary when the girls of her age got married. She then finished a basic degree, and then it’s time for her to marry so her relatives, parents chosen a groom (good in character and earning). Without a no say for any reasons, she got married. As like before said women, without knowing foreplay, orgasm, after years, the couple blessed with a girl and later with a boy. Then family planning was done to her. Because of her husband, she studied again and become a government school teacher and got salary more than her husband. What’s the point of more salary, she didn’t even know to operate the ATM being an ATM card holder. Her entire day be like“wake up early, prepare the breakfast, lunch for the family, wake up the kids and prepare them to go school, side by side getting ready for her 9 to 5 profession, return home, nourish the kids, make them learn, prepare dinner and sleep”. U may ask me, what’s the husband role in this? He will eat, go to office, chat with his friends at shop, and buy anything if told by his wife. Meanwhile all the crucial decisions would be taken by him without any suggestions from his wife. I don’t know whether she was not allowed to take decisions or she was feared about the responsibility of bad consequences if the decisions were made by her. Days was passing for Suganthi by making healthy food for family and finding happiness in family’s happiness.




Now, its time for the youth sensational, the most questioning, third life’s introduction Mrs.Kanmani, who was born on 1995 as the first girl baby to her parents. She topped in her studies, good and parents/ relatives proud girl. She neither stopped her education for attaining puberty nor for getting married. After education and years of struggle, she becomes‘financially independent woman’and trying to achieve the next level – Financial knowledge (the knowledge of where to invest/ where to save/ where to make money). Also, she is a fitness freak – eat healthy, think healthy – and never hesitated to approach a psychiatrist if had any mental issues, she believes that mental health is as equally important as physical health. On one fine day, she married her love of life, her best friend. Here the marriage happened not because of societal pressure but when she met the one,

1) whom she loves the most and never imagine a world without 2) who equally respects and love her perfection and flaws

3) who converse, question, argue, play and never let her down at any situation.

4) who share the household chores and other responsibilities.

They both discuss and make all the crucial decisions of their life and they both know to give free space and alone time to each other. After all the foreplays, orgasm and every other thing, she was blessed with a baby. They both took care of their baby and raised it in a good way. Kanmani also taken care of her parents as she believes that it was not only a son’s duty to do so.

So what’s up readers? Here is the ending part of this writing. The three lives of same gender, which almost had 2 decades gap of birth, had a huge variation in their lifestyle, choices availability, decision making power, supportive backups, perspective about life,

most importantly self-realisation. In the nutshell, the first life, she don’t even know anything the above said; the second life, though known the above said, never took the steps to make a change; the third life, known everything, stood for the change and boldly took the steps.



By Kowsalya T




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