By Riddhi Oza
Quite often we claim other people’s opinion as a fact, when in reality it is nothing but a perception. It is their perspective, and they have a right to have that. But that should not impact you. Their perspective shouldn't bother your progress or shouldn't break your confidence. I am not advising you'll to be stubborn either. Because stubbornness is the first step towards blocking your growth. Growth is a long term process which needs flexibility and acceptance. But once you make your mind rigid, it won't accept things. But when someone else gives an opinion about you, they do it based on one situation or one incident. They don't know your personality they don't know the reason for your choices and neither do they need to know. Unless you want them to know. Letting people know about your choices and yourself is not a compulsion, it's a choice.
And similarly, having an opinion about someone is also a choice, and no one can take it away from anyone. Gautam Buddha once said "People with opinions just go around bothering each other." Which is absolutely true. Having opinion is natural, but hurting someone with that opinion is an option. We have a choice of walking out of engaging in the clash or fight. At times unknowingly we get provoked by what other people thinks of us, and we act impulsively or we do something that we aren't accustomed to do. And in this, we lose a part of our personality. We lose peace and confidence, because we let someone else provoke our trust in ourself.
So what if they call you stupid? You won't become stupid by their calling, but you will definitely act stupidly if you react on their words. And then maybe, you will prove them right even though that is not in your personality. Losing our calm and control over someone else's opinion is like not eating ice cream because someone else got pneumonia. It will be of no good to them, neither to you. You will be deprived of the goodness of the delicious ice cream, and it won't even do any good to the person suffering with pneumonia. Instead you could simply let that person recover on their own, while you enjoy your ice cream. Time is the best teacher, they say. So who knows, maybe time will teach them what they need to learn. And you certainly aren't as great of a teacher as the time. So sometimes, unhearing someone's opinion after hearing it is important for your growth. Losing your peace of mind over someone else's opinion is toxic. And letting go of the judgements passed by others is the only way to gain serenity.
To make life simple, learn to accept that people’s reaction to things, people’s rejection to your talent or your work is not always about you. Sometimes, it is a reflection of what they like/dislike. It has nothing to do with you, it is their interest, their choice, and their priority, you gave your best, now let things go and just breath. This world has a lot to say, and the diversity of opinions might blind your confidence. Therefore, one must be very smart in what they want to absorb, and what the want to throw out of their minds. Because, even if we can’t control other’s reaction, their thoughts and comments, their judgements and their opinions over us or the things that we do… we can always control what we absorb or accept in our lives. Our life, our mind is our space. And we have all the right to ban the things that no longer lead us to growth.
By Riddhi Oza
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