Tears

By Medha Sharma

Walking alone on the winding road of the city, she clutched the lapels of her coat and drew them towards her. Thinking about the distance she still had to travel to reach her hotel, she clutched the pocket knife in her coat pocket. Turning right, she reached the lane where she could see her hotel and she relaxed. Finally, she reached her room, freshened up changed her clothes and sat by the balcony. Absorbing the misty air, she began to think of how everything had changed in the past few years. She remembered how she used to roam the cities carefree in her childhood days. It seemed to her that nothing could ever harm her. Her parents were there to take care of her. It had all changed now. She knew nothing was the same. 

Ever since that dreadful night, Piya was not the same. She remembered it as clearly as though it had happened yesterday. She was in college at that time. Living in another city for education was in a way adventurous. She lived in a PG near her college. It was walking distance. She would walk to her college every day. There were a few relatives of her who lived in the same neighborhood. She had often visited them with her parents. They had been friends before she was born. It was almost like she had an extended family there. Uncle aunty and their two kids were just like her own family. She would often go their house and stay the weekend if her own parents could not come over to meet her. The kids were like brother and sister to her. And aunty-uncle always looked after her as their own daughter. They would all go and see a movie or go to a restaurant and have fun.

It was one monsoon when this particular incident took place. She had received a call from her aunty that the next day would be her birthday and that she wanted Piya to come and stay with them that night so that they could catch an early morning movie. Piya loved going to them and readily agreed on the proposition. Piya told her aunty that she would attend the college and by evening she would come with her clothes so that she could stay with them. 

Piya finished her college and went to her PG. She grabbed her things and packed a small back pack. A night suit, a change of clothes for the day and few other things and she was ready to go. Piya told the PG lady that she would be back by tomorrow evening as it was aunty’s birthday and she had plans with them. She left for aunty’s house soon after. 

She reached their house just in time for the evening coffee. Aunty was sitting by the window and her phone in her hand when Piya entered. 

“I was just about to call you. What took you so long?” aunty said as she hugged her. 

“Oh aunty, I just had to finish an assignment and submit it today” Piya replied, “I know am I late but I had to finish off the work so that I could relax with you people.”

“Okay, you are excused only because it was related to your studies” she said, “ I have prepared your favourite poha for evening snacks. Freshen up and I will serve it for you.” 

“You are the best, aunty!” Piya said as she went to the washroom to freshen up.

It was a ritual for aunty to prepare something for Piya whenever she visited as she knew how Piya disliked the food at her PG. 

“When will uncle return from work?” Piya called out from the washroom. 

“He said he will be back soon”

“Okay, the aroma is so good aunty. You are such an angel. I am so hungry and you know it…always!” Piya said as she came from the washroom and settled on the dining table. 

“I know beta! Finish this and I will bring your chocolate milkshake.”

Piya was eating her last bite as she saw two bags fly in air near the door and in came two kids, the girl was around 10 and the boy was around 6. Both the kids loved their Piya didi and came at a breakneck speed from the drawing room to the dining room to hug her first. 

“Stop..stop..you will fall down!” their mother was fussing over them as they reached and hugged their Piya didi, “she wont be running away...you know na? Piya what do you do to them? They listen to everything you say and even if I tell an essay to them they just wont listen to me.”    

“That is what is of concern na aunty...I don’t tell them an essay. At least not orally” Piya replied laughing. Piya was as fond of the brother and sister as they were of her. 

“I will bring their milk too. Please make them drink it” aunty requested to Piya and went in the kitchen to bring the milk. 

“Who will drink the glass of milk the fastest?” Piya challenged the kids and they started gulping down the glass of milk. Usually drinking milk took a lot of coaxing from there mother and in the end it would also get up to the point where the kids had to endure their mother’s anger. 

By the time the kids had changed and were playing around with Piya, uncle came from the office. The kids went to meet their father and Piya joined in the group hug too. 

The kids took Piya to their room and she spent most of her evening there. They went out when aunty called them for dinner. It was the usual banter around the dining table and Piya was still unaware of what the future had in hold for her. 

After the kids had gone to sleep, Piya, aunty and uncle were sitting in their bedroom and discussing the usual things. It was just before midnight and uncle had told Piya to light up the cake that he had bought for his wife. Piya went to the kitchen and brought the cake to their bedroom. They had switched off the lights. Aunty was pleasantly surprised because she knew that her husband could not have done this without any external help and she laughed a lot when Piya told her about how uncle had messed up the cakes at the cake shop. Just then they heard the phone ring in the drawing room and aunty went to pick up the phone call.

To this day Piya was not sure how and what had happened but she suddenly felt two hands grab her face and her uncle sticking his tongue in her mouth. And kissing her forcefully. She was at a total loss on what she should do. It was an unprecedented attack. And it ended as abruptly as it had started. She heard her aunty hang up the phone call and return to the dark bedroom. 

“It was my sister from Bombay” aunty said settling down on the bed, “turn on the lights now so that we can have some cake.” 

And the lights were switched on, but for Piya it was still dark. She was still in a state of shock. She bade a goodnight to both of them hardly muttering the reason for her going to sleep early.     

She quickly came in the guest room and shut the door tightly. She double checked the locks on the door. She was so terrified and confused that she could not understand what had to be done next. She went to pack her bags but remembered it was quite late and that she would not be allowed in the PG after hours. She thought of calling her parents but couldn’t bring herself to do so. So, she went into the bathroom and started the shower. She went in the shower fully clothed. The icy water pierced her skin but it did not matter to her. She started rubbing her lips as if she wanted to remove a leech sucking on her. She was also rubbing her body vigorously as if it had been defiled by something impure and rubbing it off would make her clean. Her whole body, her lips had now gone red because of the scrapping that she had done. She stepped out of the bathroom dripping with water, picked up her stuff and went out of the house. It was raining, she started going away from that house. She wanted to place as much distance as possible from the house. She was furious on how she had let him touch her. How could he do it? He had always been a father figure to her and now this? Even in the raging rain she realized she had tears streaming down her face. She tried stopping her tears with her hands but she couldn’t. It was as if the sky was crying too. It was as if something pure had been destroyed and the world wouldn’t be same to anyone now. But she could not cry, it was not her fault. It was that monster’s. 

Trrrriiinnnggggg…..and she was jolted from her traumatic dream. She realized she was sweating profusely and the tears were still there…even after all those years.  

By Medha Sharma