The closed darkness

The summer day I was walking down the streets,
I remember the fragrance of my deep stained grief,
Wondrous to what I have done that made my life so ruined.
I am so glad that feeling of awe in the reaction to the bruise I made.
I was not in the position of returning back to the past memories I led in the fields,
I didn’t wanted either to playback all the plays, all roles I created in the meadows.
They say that “The future is not yet written”.
But I feel I already screwed up my futuristic life.
I clearly defined the definition of that terminology that made me so serious to an extent I don’t know.
This fossil corpse is breathing in and out every seconds and every minute with fuelled hatred of the society.
I don’t know to define the reason of my

subjected anger for the cruel world.
We, the humans who made this world full of relationships are the only one who break and destroy the homes.
Why we still so curious to know each other when we’ll end up having a broken heart.
This lurking threat had threatened me so much to make a mistake and destroy the loved hurt.
I am not too good to have a broken soul but now I am adopted with the teared up soul.
The blues and blacks of the shattered life I approve.
Is already having a rusted trust to continue again the other shaded colours.
I rampaged my life like a Nazi attacked town.
I gave up my soul, my breath , my heart and gave the wreath by myself to me,
The demonic brain which carry all the strain that led to migrane.

I am happy to feel that pressured heart and mind in the reaction to the wound I created.
I feel terror and awed to the amazement I gave to the patriarchal dictators house. showed a little attachment to the womb I belong.
I felt pleasured with the person I share the belongingness of the womb.
I wanted to lose all the inherited traits I aquire from my gods of life.
But I hesitated the next second when I heard the soothing deep voice saying”It’s okay dear”.
Passing through the shaded highway under the trees after trees.
Droplets dripping down from the tree leaves making the tinkling sound.
After dropping and bouncing off again at an extended height, making ripples reminds me the enjoyable days I spent .
I watched the oceanic stretches , the Perry bouys made me felt the same feeling I had

not so long ago.
I pissed off the feelings and tore it down like a paper.
I am so wierd to have that feeling now.
I kicked a rock in the main Street going down a bridge from the crust.
Lost in the shattered dreams, collecting all pieces in dark to make large sheets of memories Awkward noises reaching from the outdated radio.
I clicked the red button and shut off the radio
The very second I heard a bombarded sound just near me.
And the very second I found myself seclused by the white walls of hospital.
My nose covered with the oxygen supplier fuelling like I am more disabled now.
Each and every piece of my body appeared numb and dumb like limestone statue above a pedestal.
The every second I think of the tips of my

finger make me think more of capabilities that I don’t do now.
I suddenly noticed the presence of a crowd looking at me with crying faces.
I focused my eye lenses ta their faces and I was pleased to see that the crowd was of my family looking at me with tensed eyes.

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